When it first came out, it was online. I was scrolling through the comments on a YouTube video when I came across a video that mentioned being gay. Without thinking about it, I answered, “Me too.” It was my first time engaging with other LGBTQ+ people online, but it wouldn’t be my last.
As a teenager, I was immersed in endless discussions and debates with every LGBTQ+ person I could find on social media. Online escapism is not a unique experience. The Trevor Project’s 2024 National Survey on LGBTQ+ Youth Mental Health found that 68% of LGBTQ+ youth found positive spaces online. For LGBTQ+ youth, these connections are essential not only to feel less alone, but also to know that acceptance exists.
As it becomes more accepted for teens to be open about their LGBTQ+ identities, I hope these communities don’t disappear. Despite the seeming emptiness of transportation wars and call-to-action posts, they have real value. I have made friends who don’t have the same experience as me. They lived in different states, different countries, different continents. It was an eye-opener. For the first time, I talked to people who didn’t grow up in the same town as me.
Everything felt too famous online. Every week I cycled through circuits of labels and identities. Being confused felt safest. I didn’t have to worry about being found because I was surrounded by people who were just as lost as I was. No one needed consistency. Everyone was free to explore all possibilities without the assumption that they were insecure or seeking attention.
It’s easy to get comfortable thinking that the Internet is ubiquitous. Many of our generation grew up online. There is a direct danger to what social media aids and abets. Stalking, harassment, and cyberbullying are as much a part of internet culture as emojis, abbreviations, and memes. LGBTQ+ youth are especially at risk for in-person and cyberbullying compared to heterosexual cis youth. I wasn’t completely bullied, but I felt alone. Without the barrier of a keyboard, I didn’t know how to talk to people.
Even my anonymous blog wasn’t as private as I thought. When I was in middle school, a friend of mine discovered my blog and immediately recognized it as me. When she asked me about it, it felt invasive and alarming. Obviously, the internet has become more regulated since I was in middle school. Zephyr Teachout, law professor and editor of The Nation, calls for banning addictive algorithms, limiting notifications and geolocation data, and restricting social media use overall for those under 14. It provides detailed explanations of the various bills.
I applaud all attempts to make us safer online, but no amount of censorship or restriction can completely eradicate the dangers of the Internet. The only way to keep your children safe is to keep them informed about how to use the Internet in a productive and healthy way. It is not and will not be possible to exclude people under the age of 18 from unregulated online spaces. Even if it were, it’s a bad idea. Without the Internet, we may still not understand ourselves.
